I thought Jesus was a Construct of Man

Marra's Story

How Marra's wanderlust lead her to Mexico and a discovery about God.

"No part of me thought that Jesus was real, or that he had ever lived. Then I realized everything I had experienced as love, truth, and joy, was just a shadow of what I could have if I said 'yes' to Jesus."

Video Transcription

Hi, my name is Mara. We're at Crux Rock Climbing Gym. My husband and I bought the gym three or four years ago. We moved from Mexico with our two young children to Eugene 12 years ago.

Our lives were very full with lots of moving before Eugene and to be in one place for this long now has been a huge blessing. When we moved to Mexico, our neighbor invited us to go to church and I just looked at my husband like, “Oh heck no.”

He, we were both not big fans of church, church community, and what we thought of as judgments and criticisms that went along with it. But he really wanted to get to know this neighbor and he let me know that we were going to church. So we went and we really enjoyed the community and the people.

They were really nice and they were different than what we had experienced and what we expected and there was just something about them that drew us to desire to have friendships and connections in that community. As I was sitting in this church service with the preacher speaking in Spanish, which I only understood bits of at this point in time, I was just kind of zoned out, and in a moment God spoke to me. I almost fell out of my chair when he said to me, “Will you receive my son?”

No part of me thought that Jesus was real or had ever lived or any of it. I thought he was a construct of man in order to control men and I didn't want any part of that.

When God said that to me I knew He was real and I knew he must be good because God is good but I was not willing to leave my lifestyle that I was in. Which I mean we weren't doing anything I think that most people would see a problem with, but it was definitely living for ourselves.

I said to God, “Okay like you know my thoughts or heart. In his mercy and grace, He didn't just slam a door in my face at that moment, which is what I would have done to somebody if I'd offered them a gift and they were like, ‘no.’ Instead, he put all these impressions in my heart and they were just, I don't know how to describe them, they're just I just knew somehow that everything that I had experienced as love, as truth, as wonder, as goodness fun, joy was all just a shadow a shallow bit of what I could receive if I said, ‘yes.’